Appraisal Scoop

Santa Clause - Former Real Estate Appraiser!

Santa gets firsthand look at consumer cutbacks

By Adrian Sainz

Robert Ecker was bored with retirement, so he went back to work as a housing appraiser in Stockton, Calif. He trained four other appraisers during the real estate boom -- all of them are now out of the business.

   "Since the real estate market closed down, I grew a beard and now I'm doing this," said Ecker, dressed in the trademark red suit with white trim.

"The older kids are asking for clothes now, rather than gifts," he said. "Most of them are asking for one gift."

From Stockton to Miami, from ritzy Las Vegas to gritty Detroit, cities with the worst real estate markets led the U.S. economy into recession. Skidding home prices and soaring foreclosures have magnified the broader woes of unemployment, stock market turmoil and hard-to-get loans. Holiday shoppers are making a list, checking it twice, and then scratching off the nonessentials.

Click here for the full article!

Humor/Video: The Realtor

This is a GREAT parody of what a Realtor does on any given day!  Heaven help us if anyone ever does one of these on an Appraiser!

Here's just a couple of lines from the video:

With a run-down home in the background, the Realtor phones in his MLS description: "OK, uh try this.  Cozy 4-bedroom Victorian ahhh in uh quiet residential neighborhood.  All original hardwood and fixtures. Just paint and move in!"

The Open House: "I always prep for an "Open" the same way every time. Huh!  Hey! Call me superstitious. Ya gotta feel comfortable about the house you're showing. Ya gotta make it feel like you're selling your own home." (As he looks through their drawers and opens the refrigerator) "Tricks of The Trade?  Do not try to do an Open House on an empty stomach!" (then brushes his teeth with their toothbrush!)
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Humor: Awkward Loan Interview with Henry Paulson & Ben Bernake

Henry Paulson and Ben Bernanke appear in Congress with hat in hand for the world's most awkward loan interview ever.

Watch as Jon Stewart acts as a Loan Officer checking their employment and finding out just how much they want to borrow!!

Humor: Typical Appraisal Desktop

Former Real Estate Appraiser Pokes Fun at the Housing Boom

According to the Wall Street Journal blog (click here) this video was written by a former home appraiser, Dave Girtsman of Ventura, Calif., and animated by Amy Baniecki. 

The video depicts the increasing woes of a homeowner as he takes out a mortgage at a teaser rate – and then another – with hopes to “refi in a hurry.”

Mr. Girtsman was employed as a home appraiser from 2002 - 2004 in California. With home prices soaring, he often wondered, “Who could afford these mortgage payments?” he says.

And while it didn’t happen often, a lender would sometimes ask him to say what he thought a home’s value was before he appraised it, Mr. Girtsman says.

The implication: If the value didn’t match what the lender wanted, he wouldn’t get the job. Mr. Girtsman says that he resisted.

Humor (Video) Mortgage Broker Telemarketing Call

This is a  February 2008 call from a mortgage company in California using a telemarketing company as the middle-man to make the initial phone call. The telemarketer makes no sense and keeps repeating the same sentences over and over again:

• It's a U.S. Government loan . . .Just like shaking President Bush's hand!
• The bank isn't going to get sold . . .your loan isn't going to float to the moon for all you know!
• All I need is your fax number . . .then I'll call you tomorrow . . .same time same station, just like Batman!
• This is the hardest job in the U.S. right now . . .to do mortgages!

Once the telemarketer, who doesn't want to slow down and "lose his momentum", gets his potential client hooked . . . he transfers the call to a "mortgage broker".  The broker says he can "push" some guidelines in order to get the loan through.  Hmmmm?    And somehow it's APPRAISERS that need more regulation???!!!

Runt Rants - Back to Business

My, my, my!  What a wonderful place Appraisal Scoop has become!  So many excellent columns: highlighted by Patrick Egger's great "Outside The Boxes" additions.  I’ve read every one of Pat’s words and learned so much to apply to my business!   And the active commenting that has developed, centered on “they who cannot be named”, but now branching out to create an interesting dialog on so many issues!  A rich tapestry has been spun here, all to Brian Davis’ ever lasting credit.  I knew he could do it: never had a doubt.

My posts have been limited of late.  I think now is a good time to return.  I think I can contribute.  We’ll see.  You be the judge as always.  My original Runt Rant was an introduction….of me, my background, my biases, my limitations.  It also stated my objectives for the space I’m taking up here.  I’m a business owner first and foremost.  That is also my limitation.  I try to give perspective of managing a business, and only that.  Luckily, managing a business, especially an appraisal business, allows so many excursions into back avenues and dusty trails, into ideas and ideals, into managing change.  And managing change is my strong suit; by nature and by experience. 

Today we'll talk about some aspects of management of change.  As always, it gets a little personal, I don’t like that, but my experience is really all I have to share.  I’ll suffer the discomfort if it helps others. I have Leukemia.  Specifically Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia, aka CLL.  Diagnosed eight years ago.  As cancers go, it’s a good one to have. 

Click here to continue reading . . .

Humor: How The Internet Brings Us Together

[Humor] Stigmatized Properties - Oh Yes! The "Thing" Lives Down There . . .

I think you'll enjoy this sales agent's honesty in dealing with the "shapeless mass of malevolent energy" that lives in the basement and guards the gateway to another dimension.  Thanks to the BlueRoof blog for finding this great video!

Video: "Old School" Appraising

Check out Nick Appraiser's GREAT video on Old School Apprais'n!

Ahhhh . . .Yes!  The good old days of appraising.  Now these youngsters with their digital cameras, and signatures, and G-mail and things!   I remember a time when we glued our pictures into our reports!  MLS . . What's an M-L-S?  We didn't have any "on-line" public records . . .the only lines we had were for hanging our laundry!  And we delivered our reports through the post office!  And, you had to wait a couple days to get your reports.